Chapter 4 : The Long-Awaited Discussion
(Narrator : Jessica)
I can’t stop replaying the evening in my head. Everything went wrong. This weekend, which I’d imagined as a pleasant escape, a chance to unwind, has taken a turn I never saw coming. How could I have guessed that the “new guy” everyone was so eager to introduce me to would be Josh… my own brother?
I feel stupid. Ridiculous. For days, my friends had been hyping him up, dropping hints and jokes, building him up in my mind. And there I was, imagining someone new—a stranger, someone I might actually connect with, maybe even feel desired by after months of nothing… Only to find out that this stranger is Josh.
My cheeks burn just thinking about it. The jokes Harper and Chloe cracked, their laughter as they teased me about my “thing for muscular brunettes,” and there I was, laughing along with them, completely unaware of what was waiting for me. And when I finally saw Josh standing there in front of the house, everything crumbled. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
I feel trapped in this humiliating situation. Why did I play along? I never should have pretended not to know him. But when I saw him, my brain reacted before I could even think. It was a reflex—a way to run, to avoid an even bigger scene in front of everyone. My friends don’t know he’s my brother, and in that split second, I chose silence. I decided to act like this was just a regular meeting. But nothing about this is normal.
I let out a sigh, trying to come up with some logical explanation for my behavior. Why didn’t I say anything? Maybe I was afraid the truth would make things even more awkward. Or maybe I didn’t want my friends to feel bad about all the jokes they’d made. What could I even say, after all? The teasing, the laughter—it all would’ve taken on a whole new, uncomfortable meaning if they’d known.
Now I’m stuck in this absurd lie, and so is Josh. I can see how uncomfortable he is, just like me. We haven’t spoken about any of it, not a single word. And yet, every glance we’ve exchanged since the start of the evening is heavy with what’s left unsaid. I can tell he wants answers, just like I do. But what could we even say? There’s no way to make this situation any less bizarre.
A strange mix of tension and frustration churns inside me. I want to talk to him, to clear this up, to find a way to make things normal again. But it feels like the situation is spiraling out of my control. My friends are here, the guys too, and there’s no way I can pull Josh aside without raising questions. I’m trapped.
I feel so stupid for letting myself get caught up in this ridiculous scenario. First, I was excited at the thought of meeting this “new guy,” and then completely thrown when I realized it was Josh. Now, I don’t even know how to act around him. The jokes and innuendos from my friends keep replaying in my mind, and with each one, I feel more and more uneasy. They don’t know, of course, but their teasing adds another layer to an already unbearable situation.
I can’t stop asking myself: What if they found out? What if they realized the guy they’re trying to set me up with is my brother?
The thought sends a shiver down my spine. I need to find a way out of this. I need to talk to Josh, to clear the air. But for now, I’m stuck in this room, in this evening, surrounded by everyone.
As the evening goes on, the atmosphere around the table stays lively. Laughter bounces back and forth, conversations overlap, but I remain distracted, unable to fully engage with what’s happening. Every now and then, I steal a glance at Josh, wondering if he feels the same tension I do. Everything feels fake, artificial. We’re both stuck in this role, and I know he’s just as desperate as I am to find a way out of this mess.
Then, out of nowhere, Josh pushes back his chair and stands, immediately drawing everyone’s attention.
- Josh: “I’m going out for a smoke.”
His tone is casual, but I know him too well. Josh doesn’t smoke. I understand immediately what he’s doing. It’s an excuse, a way to step away and give me the chance to follow him without drawing too much attention. My heart beats faster. This might be our only chance to talk without our friends listening to every word.
I take a deep breath, hesitating for a moment. Should I follow him? If I stay here, I won’t get the chance to address the weight sitting between us. But getting up right after him is bound to draw some looks, maybe even questions… or jokes. Still, I don’t really have a choice. I need to talk to him.
Before I can overthink it any further, my legs move on their own.
- Jessica: “I’m going to get some fresh air too.”
As expected, the comments come flying immediately.
- Harper (with a mischievous smile): “Aw, going out together? How cute!”
- Brice (with a smirk): “Just don’t take too long… or get too loud!”
Laughter erupts around the table, and I feel my cheeks burning. I force a nervous smile, trying not to show how much those jokes are getting under my skin. My friends join in, laughing along, and for a brief moment, I wonder if they suspect anything. But no, they’re just running with the idea that there’s something between Josh and me. If they knew the truth, the laughter would stop in an instant.
I stick to smiling, even as the embarrassment wells up inside me. Josh doesn’t react either. He stays expressionless, as if he didn’t hear a thing. Finally, we leave the room, slipping out under the amused gazes of our friends, the door clicking shut behind us.
The cool night air hits my face, but it does nothing to soothe the tension bubbling inside me. Josh walks a little farther, stopping under the shadow of a tree, far from the terrace, far from the laughter, far from the prying eyes.
I follow him silently, my heart still racing. This is it. The moment to clear the air.
We stand there in the dark, a few steps away from the house, surrounded by the cool air and the faint murmurs of our friends in the distance. The awkwardness between us is almost tangible. My heart feels like it’s pounding so loudly that anyone could hear it. Josh turns his head slightly toward me, as if trying to find the right words. He looks just as tense as I feel.
- Josh (in a low, hurried voice): “Jess! Why did you do that?”
His question bursts out like an explosion—quick and almost desperate. He doesn’t bother softening the blow, and neither do I. We’re trapped in this mess, and I know we need to talk about it, even though every part of me wants to run from this conversation. I take a deep breath, but before I can string together a clear response, the words tumble out on their own.
- Jessica (nervous): “I don’t know… I… it was a reflex. I panicked.”
I’m speaking too fast, the words tumbling over each other in my head, but nothing I say seems to make any sense. I feel even more foolish now that we’re talking about it. Josh stares at me, just as confused as I am, searching for answers to a situation that’s completely out of his grasp.
- Josh (frowning): “Panicked? About what?”
His tone is a mix of confusion and concern. I can tell he’s trying to understand, but even I can’t fully explain what I felt. Everything happened so fast, and I didn’t think it through. I let out a frustrated sigh.
- Jessica (hurried): “I don’t know, it was just… I saw you, and with all the things they were saying, the jokes, I thought if I said you were my brother, it’d make things weird. And then… I don’t know, I just pretended. I shouldn’t have.”
Josh runs a hand through his hair, visibly frustrated by the situation, though not angry. He’s just as lost as I am. His eyes drop to the ground, and he shakes his head as if trying to sort out his thoughts.
- Josh (sighing): “You’ve made it even weirder, you know.”
His remark, though spoken softly, hits me hard. He’s right. This lie has turned what could have been a simple meeting into an awkward, incomprehensible mess. Guilt churns in my stomach, and I can see he feels trapped too. I wish I could undo it all, but now we’re stuck, and I have no idea how to get out.
I glance back at the house, at the lights spilling through the windows, and the weight of it all presses down on me. I don’t know what to say to fix this.
- Jessica (fidgeting nervously): “I know, it’s stupid. But what do we do now? We can’t tell them the truth after all this—it’d just make it worse…”
He’s thinking, but his expression mirrors the same confusion I feel. The silence between us grows heavy, uncomfortable. Finally, he responds, his voice quiet, like he’s trying to come to terms with the situation.
- Josh (resigned): “I guess we just keep playing along… We don’t really have a choice now. It’s just for the weekend.”
I nod, even though every fiber of me hates the idea. Continuing this lie feels like the worst possible solution, but what else can we do? We can’t turn back now, not after everything that’s already been said and done. I bite my lip in frustration, searching for a solution that doesn’t exist. Josh looks at me, and I can see he’s just as tense as I am, though he’s trying to stay practical.
- Josh (sighing, slightly more relaxed): “We just need to be careful. Not too close, you know? Otherwise, they’ll start asking questions.”
I nod again, but the discomfort lingers. We’ve only just seen each other again after months apart, and all we’re doing is dodging the truth, avoiding reality. I want to talk about us, about his return, about how he’s doing, but all of that is smothered by this ridiculous situation.
For a moment, we stand in silence, each lost in our own thoughts. The stress from our quick, muddled conversation slowly begins to fade. The cool night air seems to soothe our overheated minds. We’ve found some kind of solution, even if it doesn’t feel entirely right. We both know this weekend won’t be easy, but at least we have a plan.
Josh sighs, releasing some of the tension he’d been carrying, and I feel a little lighter myself. Finally, he’s the one to break the silence, his voice much calmer this time.
- Josh (with a faint smile): “This is ridiculous, isn’t it? Here we are, hiding like kids just to avoid saying we’re brother and sister.”
His comment makes me smile—really smile, for the first time tonight. He’s right. This whole thing is so absurd. We’ve spent the entire evening pretending to be strangers, when in reality, we’re closer than anyone else here. The contrast is almost laughable, and it’s a relief to see that he’s starting to find it ridiculous too.
- Jessica (laughing softly): “Yeah, honestly, we couldn’t have handled it worse.”
I see Josh’s smile grow a little wider, and some of the tension between us seems to dissolve. For the first time since this evening began, I feel a bit lighter. Maybe we can let go of the stress, just for a moment, and enjoy this. After all, it’s been months since I’ve seen him, and instead of savoring our reunion, we’ve been drowning in the weight of this ridiculous lie.
Without thinking too much, I step closer and wrap my arms around him. It feels natural—a simple gesture, but filled with comfort. I feel Josh hesitate, surprised at first, but then he hugs me back, his arms pulling me in. It’s like the weight of the evening lifts in an instant.
- Jessica (softly): “It’s been so long, Josh…”
- Josh (murmuring): “Yeah, I missed you.”
His words are simple, but they hit me deep. I’ve missed him too. All the stress, all the confusion, had almost made us forget that above everything else, we’re siblings. It feels so good to just be here with him, just the two of us, without having to pretend.
We stay like that for a moment, soaking in the comfort of a sibling’s embrace. Josh is the first to pull back, but I can see in his eyes that he’s just as relieved as I am to have this moment of connection. His smile is more genuine now, and it warms me to see it.
- Josh (teasing): “Okay, but we’re going to have to avoid this kind of thing in front of them, or they’ll definitely start asking questions.”
I laugh softly, knowing he’s right. We need to be careful. Still, in this little moment, everything feels easier, lighter. For a second, I think maybe this weekend won’t be as terrible as I imagined.
- Jessica (smiling): “Yeah, we’ll be careful… but it’s so good to see you again.”
Josh nods, his smile soft. I can tell he’s glad to be here, despite everything that’s happened. We share a quiet moment, enough to remind me that no matter how complicated things get, we’re still the same—brother and sister, with the easy bond we’ve always had.
A wave of comfort washes over me. We can handle this. This weekend will be strange, no doubt, but at least I’m not alone in it. Josh is here with me, and I know we can face the awkwardness together.
- Jessica (after a moment): “We should head back inside. They’re going to start wondering what we’re up to.”
Josh nods, but before heading back to the house, he places a comforting hand on my shoulder—a subtle gesture, yet filled with the kind of sibling bond that reassures me. I feel a calming warmth, the kind that comes from knowing he’s here for me, just as I am for him.
- Josh (with a slight smile): “Alright, let’s get back to pretending we’re strangers.”
I laugh, even though deep down, the situation still feels fragile. But for now, I feel better. We’ve had this small moment to ourselves, and it’s exactly what I needed.
As we walk back to the house, I can already hear the laughter of our friends inside. Josh holds the door open for me, and the moment we step through, the teasing starts up again. Harper, ever the first to toss out innuendos, greets us with a mischievous grin.
- Harper (playfully): “So, how was your little lovers’ getaway? You sure took your time!”
Laughter explodes around the table, and I feel my cheeks heat up instantly. I force a smile, but inside, I’m drowning in discomfort. They won’t let go of this idea, as if everyone’s convinced there’s something going on between Josh and me. If only they knew.
I sit down, trying not to draw attention to myself, but every glance I meet seems laced with playful curiosity. Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves—except me.
- Brice (winking at Josh): “You didn’t go out to smoke, did you? That’s not what you were doing out there…”
- Paul (laughing): “Yeah, we know, Josh. The ‘smoke’ was just an excuse, huh?”
Another wave of laughter rolls through, and I sit there, frozen, trying to keep a neutral face. But every joke feels like it drags me further into this pit of embarrassment. Josh, sitting beside me, just smiles. He’s clearly uncomfortable too, but he plays along. He’s good at this, while I have no idea how to react. With every new quip, I feel the urge to get up and run.
Why is this so unbearable? I keep asking myself why I let this lie happen. It’s made everything so much more complicated. Instead of just telling the truth, I’ve created a situation where every comment pushes me deeper into discomfort. They don’t know anything, but their ignorance somehow makes it worse. I feel trapped in a game where every move, every word, risks exposing our secret.
I take a sip of my beer, trying to calm myself down, but it doesn’t help. My thoughts keep circling back to that moment when I saw Josh standing outside the house. If I had just told the truth then… But now, it’s too late.
The pre-dinner drinks carry on in a noisy, lively atmosphere. Harper and Chloe are sharing funny stories from their recent nights out, and everyone is laughing uproariously. I laugh too—or at least I try—but I can’t fully relax. At any moment, I’m bracing myself for another joke or innuendo that will send me spiraling further into discomfort.
- Chloe (teasing): “So, Jess, did you really go out for fresh air, or are you hiding something from us?”
I force a smile, unsure how to respond. Everyone’s eyes are on me, waiting for my reaction, but no words come to mind.
I can’t tell the truth now. I just have to keep it together.
Before I can say anything, Brice jumps in with a loud laugh.
- Brice (laughing): “Oh, come on, we all know the ‘fresh air’ was just an excuse to sneak off with Josh!”
I smile, but the embarrassment is overwhelming. Once again, I can’t defend myself, can’t tell them how wrong they are. If only they knew that Josh is my brother, that this situation is already complicated enough without their jokes. I feel so small, so trapped. My thoughts race, and all I want is for this evening to end.
How am I going to survive the whole weekend?
After a while, Paul stands and claps his hands, announcing that it’s time to eat.
- Paul (clapping): “Alright, everyone to the table! Dinner’s ready.”
I’m relieved to leave the suffocating atmosphere of the drinks table, even if the thought of spending more hours with them weighs on me. Dinner is simple: pasta, some salad, and a few dishes to share. Nothing fancy, but it’s just right after such a long evening of drinks and banter. As everyone moves to the dining table, I take a deep breath. Maybe things will settle down now.
But just before we sit, Brice throws me another sly smile.
- Brice (smirking): “Oh, by the way, Josh, you told me last time… you like redheads, right?”
A brief silence falls over the group. I freeze. I know exactly where he’s going with this. Everyone slowly turns their heads toward Josh, then to me. My cheeks blaze instantly as I lock eyes with Josh, who looks just as startled as I feel. I want to disappear. Why did Brice have to say that?
Josh forces a smile, but I can tell he’s just as uncomfortable as I am. He replies in a lighthearted tone, trying to play it off with humor, but I can hear the tension in his voice.
- Josh (nervously laughing): “Oh… yeah, I guess…”
The group bursts into laughter, but all I feel is the knot tightening in my stomach. It’s unbearable. I feel trapped in this situation, and every joke, every innuendo only makes the discomfort worse. I lower my eyes, fiddling with my fork, unable to meet anyone’s gaze.
This isn’t going to stop…